Tuesday, 17 July 2007 / 17:06
I think I’m more than screwed today.. I must haf be possessed to write abt tat stupid issue this morning on msn.. Shit.. Now I’m really screwed le la.. Haiz.. Wad haf I done to deserve all this torture.. Haven I already made up my mind to stay outta love’s way to avoid getting screwed? Y am I still in such a mess? Is it juz plain worry for a fren who’s far away in another place? Or is my feelings for real? Bt hw can it be? We were nv close frenz.. It’s so way impossible.. haiz.. Dilemma.. Shit.. Dreams 5 tot me to be courageous.. N I told myself to face my emotions wif an innocent heart.. Bt I’m juz simply so confused.. 3yrs of emotional torture has already shredded me into pieces.. I’ve no strength to con’t playing this game.. After all, it might juz be my own wishful thinking.. Dreams 5 had only given me enuf strength to move outta the emotional trauma, barely enuf to play another game.. I’m nt a religious person (though I pray to mother nature) & I’m definitely nt gonna pray for more strength.. Hmm.. Frenz had been wondering.. Where has tat once so “forthright abt love” Andreas gone to? Where is tat gal who goes up to the guy whom she likes & said I like u? Where is tat gal who’s always so hopeful & loves to daydream abt her Mr Right? Well, maybe my frenz were right.. The old Andreas is gone.. Juz tat I hate to admit it.. Juz tat I tot I could manage & revive tat old Andreas.. Wad a BIG FAT JOKE?! It’s gone.. Gone wif Liu.. Gone wif Shi.. Gone…..
I’m glad I’ve participated in Dreams 5.. It has taught me tat “wad doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger” & learn to come to terms wif myself, both my strengths & weaknesses.. I should learn to love my present me.. Loving oneself is harder than loving another human being.. Meanwhile, I'll wk on my passion.. Guiding.. Toking of which, I've missed last Sat's YAC mtg cos Ms Ng's sms came in the amidst of my damn emo friday dreams 5 closing ceremony.. By the time I read the sms again, the mtg's over.. Bt i've registered myself for the NYC conference already.. Hope i can gt in.. Hehe.. In the amidst of planning some fun this 2nd half of the yr.. hmm.. Putri, end of yr gt 2 events.. U can't miss it k!! N hor.. No worries, we'll haf chance to camp again.. Meanwhile, pls study hard & gif ya parents no excuse to cut u off from Guiding.. Any prob wif Chemistry can always look for me!! (*,*)
Angel Andreas
A 21 year old who’s really embrace her challenging career and future.
Andreas_neo123@msn.com
"To Be Or Not To Be, That’s The Question."
When you wish upon a star,
Everyone around me will be happy, healthy and safe.
A successful career.
